I Almost Died in a Lava Spewing Sinkhole!

There are things in life we expect.  Somewhere in our 80 years of life we might have a leaky roof or our kids might put regular dishwashing liquid in the dishwasher or maybe a car will be stolen.

We expect these things.  We prepare for these things.  We tell our kids right after we read this blog, “Do NOT use regular dishwashing liquid in the dishwasher.”

But there are some dangers you never think to expect.  And when Wendy invited us to lunch the other day I wasn’t prepared to have my very life and limb put at risk while I sipped my soup.

There we were, gathered in her home, ready to settle down to our soup and Klondike bars when she mentions the sink hole behind the very house we’re all sitting in.

What?

Wait.  Surely she meant to say the broken lawnmower behind the house.  I mean, a broken lawnmower is expected.  But a sink hole?

“Sink…hole?”

“Yeah.  You can see it best from the kids’ room upstairs.”

This, I had to see.  Surely everyone would feel the same way?  No.  No!  They just sat there, immune to the Dread Horror a mere 50 yards away, and chit-chatted while I darted up the stairs to assess the danger.

And there, not too far from her house was a monstrous sink hole!

Well, maybe not monstrous, but it wasn’t like I had to squint to see it.  Sheesh!  It was with great reservation and a light step on the stairs, so as not to disturb the fragile ground beneath my feet, that I rejoined the group and sipped my soup.

But the kids!  The kids!  They went stomping and clomping and Jurassic-Park-making-the-water-wiggle pounding up and down the stairs.  Stop!  Just stop before we’re all swallowed up by the earth and don’t get to finish our Klondike bars!

Here is Wendy’s sinkhole.  You can see her yard at the bottom of the picture.

_DSC3663-small

With the zoom lens: _DSC3660-small

More zoom:

_DSC3659-small

I think we should move Lunch at Wendy’s to Lunch Anywhere That Doesn’t Have a Flippin’ Sink Hole In The Backyard.

Today Wendy, after a month of nonchalant gazing at the Hole to Hades, finally got around to trying to figure out who owns the land behind her house.  Hurry up, Wendy–get that hole filled in!  It might start spewing lava!

P.S.  I dare you to look at the 3rd picture in this series and not shudder in horror.

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7 thoughts on “I Almost Died in a Lava Spewing Sinkhole!

    • Yes. She lives next to a quarry and she called them today. They say it’s not their property, so she’s trying to figure out who owns the property. She could also try the state’s geological association. I’m going to look up their number for her to call.

      • For crying out loud! Darling Husband just found charts of all the local sinkholes and apparently, they’re EVERYWHERE! Ack! According to the one chart, there are six known sinkholes behind Wendy’s house. And there are a 5 million “depressions” around my neighborhood. (Precursors to sinkholes.)

    • So bizarre. I never knew any of this until Wendy’s sinkhole last month. Wasn’t there some sort of bad-guy character who lived in an airplane? It never landed and was refueled in air. Maybe we should all live in airplanes.

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