Unwilling Pet Sitting, and it’s Wigging Out My Family

Remember my friends Mary and Joseph?   Those aren’t their real names.  I just call them Mary and Joseph because I imagine that Mary and Joseph were a lot like this couple.

But after today I may have to change that.  After today, Fred and Ethel would be more appropriate.

On Tuesday, Mary and Joseph’s sons visited my sons and brought their hermit crabs with them.  Unfortunately, when the boys left, the crabs were left behind, forgotten.

The next morning, lo and behold, I see that the crabs are still in my house.  No biggie?  Yes, biggie!  Mary and Joseph headed out that morning on a 6 day road trip.  Um….what am I supposed to do with hermit crabs for the next six days?


Going for a walk.

We tried taking them on walks, but whenever we tugged on the hermit crab leash, they curled up in little balls. The boys refused to play catch with them.  Boy10 says they look like creepy bug-things and he wants nothing to do with them.  I don’t think the boys have anything to worry about.  The crabs just lie around blending in with the rocks.  Hermit crabs are pretty boring.

Since they’re so boring, I figured I may as well use them as subjects for some pictures.  But I would need an assistant.

Enter Darling Husband.

He agreed to help but then quickly realized he’d actually have to hold the crabs with his fingers.  His voice went up a good 2 octaves as he kept me informed of the actions of the crab while I focused the camera, “It’s moving!  It’s coming out of its shell! It’s trying to leave its shell and leap onto the floor!  Its claws are touching me!  They’re touching me!

I told him that they wouldn’t market hermit crabs as pets to children if we were in danger of being crushed to death in their mighty claws.


Mighty Claws of Death

And you know, I was ok with watching the hermit crabs until we received the following email:




Bryan, we left our hermit crabs at your house!!  Ugh.  So sorry about that.  We laughed so hard and then felt badly! :).

We will pick up our little friends Tuesday morning if that is ok?  They may need water here or there – but they have food in the cage.  The only special request is to please use some type of filtered water for them – their lungs burn otherwise with chlorine :).

Many thanks and sorry again! Have a great weekend!

Fred and Ethel


Did you catch the part where they “laughed so hard”?  I seriously don’t picture Mary and Joseph traveling through the holy land cackling at each other over leaving their pet hermit crabs at someone’s house.  “Zechariah is totally freaked out by hermit crabs!  Can you picture his face when Elizabeth shows him the aquarium?  Ha ha ha ha!”

Nope.  Mary and Joseph would never do that.  It’s Fred and Ethel from here out.


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