Things Parents Do When the Kids Aren’t Around

As I start writing this blog post, I’m hoping to be interrupted soon.

See, the children are supposed to be in bed, but while they were getting ready, Darling Husband turned on an old episode of Doctor Who, and now they’re all sitting around watching it.

That’s all fine and dandy, but what Darling Husband doesn’t know is that I have the fixings for Rice Krispie treats waiting on the counter.  But I won’t make them until the boys are in bed.

Why am I so selfish that I won’t share the delicious snacks with my poor children?

Because they’re Picky Eaters and Won’t Eat Anything.  No, don’t give me advice, but feel free to go ahead and judge me all you want.  I’m used to it by now.  (Yes, I’ve tried that already.  Yup—that, too.  No, you’d think that would work, but it doesn’t.)

And since they won’t eat things that are good for them, they can’t have things that are bad for them.

Of course, the exception to that rule is grandma’s house, which is a paradise of Bad Food that Tastes So Good.  (Sounds like a 70’s disco hit.)

For instance, she invited them to her Haven for the Picky Eater this past Sunday afternoon.  When they got home, I asked them what they did at Grandma’s house.  Here’s the rundown:

First, they watched Charlie Brown’s Thanksgiving and Charlie Brown’s Halloween with great big bowls of buttery popcorn on their laps.

Then they ate a nutritious dinner of hot dogs and cheese puffs.

After dinner, they watched Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs while popping Dove dark chocolates.

Then Grandma said, “You guys have been watching a lot of TV.  I think you should play the Wii now.”  Ok, maybe she didn’t say it, but that’s what happened.

While they played on the Wii, they had dessert:  chocolate and vanilla pudding with M&Ms mixed in.

At the end of the day, Grandpa delivered the kids back home forty-five minutes after their bedtime.

That was on Sunday.  We have to wait at least another two days before I can let them eat junk food.  By then, Darling Husband and I will have had time to polish off the Rice Krispie Treats.  Yes, all you children out there–your parents really do stay up late just to eat the goodies that they hide from you.  Neener, neener.

Of course, that’s providing that Darling Husband ever turns off Doctor Who and gets those kids to bed!


Rice Krispie Treats, Lizard Style:

5 cups Rice Krispies (not the 6 cups on the box recipe.)

10.5 oz mini marshmallows (not the 10 oz big marshmallows)

1 tsp vanilla

3 TBL butter.

Melt butter in big pot, slowly.  Add vanilla.  Keeping heat very low, add marshmallows and stir constantly.  You do not want them to caramelize—so keep the heat as low as you can and still have them melt.

As soon as the marshmallows are melted, the very instant the next to last one melts, remove pot from heat.  Add Rice Krispies.

The entire thing will be a great big blob of gooey mess.  Pour it into a big plastic container with a lid.  You will NOT be able to spread them in a pan and cut squares.  You’ll only be able to pull big hunks off with long strings of marshmallow.  See:

Unbelievable.  Just as I got my fingers sticky, pulling apart the treats to take the picture, the camera battery died.  Ugh.  Had to lick my fingers and start over.   Oh, the woes of a photographer!


Autumn Leaves on the Gettysburg Battlefields Field Trip pictures.

Yes!  Duh!  Of course I enhanced the colors.  No, I didn’t change them, but yes, I did enhance them.  (Messed with things like vibrance, shadows, saturation, highlights, etc.)


5 thoughts on “Things Parents Do When the Kids Aren’t Around

  1. You guys are doing a good job raising your kids.(This coming from a guy with no kids.)
    The parents of dh are doing a good job of what grandparents are supposed to do.

    • Thanks–we don’t even bat an eye anymore about what goes on at Grandma’s house. But after Boy10 told me what went down at Gma’s, I warned him:

      “One day, you’ll have kids and you’ll drop them off at my house. And when they come home, they’ll tell you what went on at my house. You’ll call me on the phone and you’ll say, ‘Moooom! How could you let our kids get away with that!? You never let us get away with that!

      Boy10 thought it was hilarious, but I told him to mark my words. Darling Husband and I used to joke around, back in the days before we wanted children, “Why can’t we go straight to grandparenting?” I can’t wait. I’m learning from a master.

  2. Tuesday night is Scout Night; I can have a tray of brownies in the oven 15 minutes after the garage door closes and the dishes soaking in the sink long before they get home. I’m totally on your side. My kids are pretty good eaters – I’m just selfish. PS- As a part of the recent song parody kick I’ve been on, I hope it’s okay if I toss that “Bad foods that taste so good” song title around and see what I can make of it. It definitely has potential….

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