If I’m Bad Cop where’s my gun? OR What do Lens Hoods and Snapple Have in Common?

I have a new job.  A job.  A real live paying job, that pays in US dollars.  No more getting paid in German Chocolate Cake, though the chocolate cake was…(warning, pun ahead)...a pretty sweet deal.

Yes.  I’m getting paid in real-live money, plus camera gear!  So far, there’s the been a deposit of the money and an extra battery for Alex and a lens hood.

The lens hood!  What a great little thing!  You ought to hear the way it *snicks* onto the camera lens.  Remember those old Snapple commercials where they made a big deal about the satisfying clicking sound their caps made when you pressed on them?  That’s what this lens hood is like.  I spent about five minutes last night just snicking the thing on and off the camera.

Wait, I thought you couldn’t get a job, because you have kids at home?

Ah, yes.  Kids.  Sometimes I think to myself, “Holey Moley!  What am I doing lazing around the house all day?  I’m late for work!” and then I remember I don’t have a job and I think, “Holey Moley!  I’m unemployed!  I need to find a job!” and then I remember that I homeschool the children.  You kind of need to be at home to do that.

Ok, so what is the job?

Bridgette owns a school that teaches test prep courses.  As part of the test prep courses, she has her students write a series of practice essays, and then she assesses their essays for their strengths and weaknesses before they take the test.

She has hired me to help assess the essays.  The student emails me an essay, and I send back an assessment.

Isn’t that kind of  boring?

No, not at all!  Turns out, it’s basically what I do every night anyway.  Every night, I sit down with Alex and stare at the picture of the day and start typing–type type type–even if there’s nothing to say.  And most of what I type is painfully, dreadfully, ghastily bad.  So, I delete the bad parts, rearrange the good parts, add a few funny lines, and voila!  The Blog is done for the night.

That’s pretty much what I’m doing with these essays, only I skip the writing part and go straight to the assessing and correcting part.

And…are you ready?….Bridgette told me I get to be Bad Cop.

Bad cop!

Bridgette said she’ll be Good Cop and bolster them in time for the test, but that initially, someone has to tell them the unvarnished truth, and I get to be that someone.

Ooooo!  I’ve never been Bad Cop.  I’m waaay too much of a pushover to be Bad Cop.  But for this, I hide behind my laptop and never see their crumpled little faces when they get my Bad Cop email.

Here’s a picture of me assessing one of the essays.  I probably shouldn’t let you see it, but…here it is.  I gave it a C+.