My Answer to “How Are Babies Made?”

Ate one of my favorite meals for dinner: spaghetti noodles with canned Hormel chili (without beans) on top, and on the side, garlic toast made from last week’s homemade bread.  And the week old homemade bread is still good!  No mold, which is always a happy discovery. (Look dear, no mold!  We can eat tonight!  Yay!)  Simple, elegant.  A feast.  Next time you visit for dinner, you can look forward to this delectable dish.  Lucky you!

Aside:  No Victor, we don’t always eat so poorly.  I keep forgetting to make the salmon.  And is it “eat so poorly” or “eat so badly”?  I need an editor.  If I could pay you to be my editor, I would.  It takes me forever to proofread for my errors.  I’m sure you could do it much quicker than I could.  Or is it “could do it more quickly than I could”?  And you’ve probably noticed the crazy use of commas.  I can never tell when I should put them in or leave them out.

Wedding reception at Li's Buffet.

For lunch, we went to the lovely Li’s Buffet where there were panels of white lace hanging from the ceiling.  Huh?  Apparently, a wedding reception was going to be held at Li’s later in the day and the white lace was separating part of the restaurant for the wedding guests.

I suppose that if I was forced to have a wedding, I could be persuaded into having a reception at Li’s.  But I dislike weddings, so will do my best to avoid having them in the future.  For which I’m sure Darling Husband is grateful.

Though we did go looking at wedding rings for Darling Husband today.  Apparently he’s finally lost his wedding ring for real this time.  That’s pretty good considering that we’ve been married for 19 years and 8 months and considering that he loses the ring about once a month.  I was sure we’d have had to replace it well before now.  He usually finds it again with a week, but this time, it’s been a few weeks.  Instead of buying a real ring, I told him to get a ring out of the gumball machine like our friend Michael did.  No one can tell.  And it’s just a quarter.  If he gets tired of it later, he can get a new ring for another quarter.  Win-win. Yes, I’m serious.  Michael’s ring is from a gumball machine and I really think Darling Husband should do the same.  We’re not too sentimental around here.

Quads the night away.

While we were at Li’s, I made Darling Husband play a board game with me.  I wasn’t sure whether I should throw the game and let him win so he’d enjoy winning so much that he’d want to play again, or if I should attempt to win the game, so that he’d demand a rematch.  In the end, my competitive nature won out and I couldn’t stop myself from playing to win.  And I did win, but probably because I’ve played the game about 4 times now, and Darling Husband has never played it.  I don’t think he’ll be so easy to beat next time.  Much as I brag about it, I’m actually not very good at games.  I just like playing and posturing about winning.

The name of the game is Quads, and when I sang, “I wanna play Quads with you (quads with you) all night!  We’ll play Quads the night away!”  to the tune of “Rock with you” by Michael Jackson, Darling Husband seemed more pained at my singing than impressed by my wit.  People just don’t appreciate my cleverness.

Li’s Buffet is opening a new Chinese restaurant across town.  The new location used to be a restaurant called the Mayflower Chinese Buffet, but now it will be JJ Hibachi Buffet.  I’ll have to ask Jin if they’re going to use all new recipes at the new restaurant.  Here are pictures of the Coming Soon sign:

And a picture of the entrance to the Mayflower with their old sign torn down over the door.

Here’s an up close picture of a Chinese dragon dude smoking a cigarette outside the restaurant.  He can’t smoke inside the restaurant, after all.  Here he is, straight from the camera.

Straight from the camera. No editing.

Here he is converted to black and white with no other editing.

Converted to black and white only

And here he is with editing.

Dramatic black and white

I was inspired by Thornberrie, another blogger who happened to stumble upon my blog one day and “liked” one of my posts.  I looked at his blog and I love his posts!  Here’s a link to his blog.  You all know I usually don’t like black and white photographs at all.  But his black and white pictures are so striking that I made an attempt to recreate his dramatic look.  I hope he doesn’t mind.  Probably not, since his dramatic black and whites are much better than mine.

He’s from England and uses all sorts of English slang.  I love reading the slang.  Like, he calls candy, sweeties.  I love it that they call candy sweeties in England.  Sweeties sound much much tastier than boring old candy.  And you have to say the “t’s”.  No “sweeDies.”  It must be sweeTies.”

BMW or Children?

While we were out looking at rings, Darling Husband saw the car he had wanted to buy, but we had kids instead.  When the kids were little and used to take baths together I would tell them the story of how they came to be our children. Here it is:

One day, your father and I visited the aquarium.  Waaaay up in the top of the aquarium, where the rain forest is, there’s a little stream of water running through the forest.  The stream ends in a pool under the bridge.  And in the pool under the bridge were two little Boy Fish.  You!   As soon as we saw you, we knew we just had to have you.  So, we asked one of the aquarium workers how much you cost.  He said, “Well, it will cost you a BMW, $35,000 a year, plus all future cost of living raises and promotions, and the company match for your 401K.”  And we said, “They’re worth it!”  So they scooped you up in a big green net and put you in a big fish bowl.  We tied the fish bowl to the top of the Geo Metro and drove you home and dumped you in the bathtub.  And here you are now!

They loved that story.  But that story’s not true.  We didn’t really buy our children from the aquarium.  We bought them from the circus.  (Har har.)

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6 thoughts on “My Answer to “How Are Babies Made?”

  1. I won’t lose my ring I used to wear it,but when I worked as a mechanic in my dads gas station the solvents chafed my finger. I now keep it on my dresser, on an incense stick holder. We no longer burn incense.

    • Exactly.

      On one hand I can’t wait for the day when I can get a job and all my money will go towards new cars and eating out whenever we want to. Eventually, we’ll be a little old couple in a Crown Victoria, having dinner every single night at the local diner, not being able to hear the server, “What’d you say, dearie? Speak up, honey!”

      But on the other hand, I dread the day when I walk in the house and it’s silent All The Time and there’s no one to give me all those hugs. Kids hug a lot. And the laughing–they laugh a lot, too! I used to try to get them to stop all the laughing so we could move on with our lessons, but now we stop the lessons and let the laughter take its course. The work still manages to get done.

      I’ll miss them so much when they grow up that I can barely stand to think about it right now.

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